HOW THEY CAME TO BE?

In a time before The Furze, in a galaxy not so far far away, Armageddon was but days away....Meanwhile our unassuming chosen one was stumbling home after a heavy session on the armpit juice of the Snaggle Toothed Toxic Bull Croaker.

He'd certainly had quite an armpit full, because not only had God appeared and run through the meaning of life with him, but more importantly, he'd had a meeting of minds with the colonel, who'd spilt the beans on his secret recipe*. So he wasn't that surprised when a devilish looking Goat-Man in a tuxedo confronted him.

Unbeknown to out hero, this goat creature had evil intentions and had been plotting this moment for some time. He had drawn up a contract that insured the savior would be forever imprisoned at the Hull Adelphi, to play his life saving melodies to the Goat-Man's underworld Cellar Dwellers. This meant curtains for all creatures great and small.

As the meeting was taking place, 'The One' was being monitored by none other than "Marshall the foul mouthed Martians," who realizing our hero could save the planet from a fate worse than deaf....ness screamed.. "Don't sign it you barnacle ridden cheese factory!"

Not contrary to our saviors belief that he was about to be beamed up by a spaceship............ he was beamed up by a spaceship!

Due to all this excitement, the Bull Croaker Juice really kicked in. There was no way back this time, he would spend the rest of his days believing he was a two slot toaster. The panic stricken Marshalls called Dr Tome Bones. who said there's only one thing for it.

At the sick bay Dr Bones explained to the Marshalls a procedure that had never before been tested. It would mean curtains for all creature-kind, but they would at last have a toaster.

After a very heated debate that would have turned jam sandwiches into pop tarts, Dr Bones reluctantly gave in and spoke of another way. This was to extract the essence out of the champion and transfer it into four other life forms( it was too powerful for just one).

The four creatures were connected to 'The One' via a large computer screen. With a huge surge of energy all of his previous escapades were displayed on the monitor before being programmed into the new hosts.

Artists played with

Elliot Smith
The Darkness
Feeder
Supergrass
Kaiser Chiefs
Aqua Lung
King Adora
Marillion

Venues played at

Troubadour
The Leadmill
Electric Ballroom
The Astoria
Barowlands
V festival
T-in the park
Golden Gate Park

Highlights

Mark and Lard plays
XFM Sessions
Single of the Week NME, BBC Radio 1
2 Film Soundtracks
Teachers Tv show 1+2
Dance Stage Mega Mix
Video's on MTV

It had worked!! With thier new found powers, "The Furze," as they were not collectively known, learned through Marshall, of the galaxies struggle and the plight of the evil Goat-Man. They were then beamed back to the dessert.

They would now go forth to preach the gospel of the master, once more brining balance back to the galaxy.... Oh and a toaster for Starship Sawmills....You know one of those really nice brushed stainless steel ones with a re-heat button...

To Be Continued!!!!!

This Bio is an animated comic, email us if you would like one.

http://www.thefurze.net/multimedia/

Contact: thefurze@threesixtyrecords.net